untitled draft #2

I've decided to post more than one of these unpublished "drafts" per day this week. It's a bit of a Spring Cleaning for me, and maybe because Spring is in the air, I find I don't hate them as much as I did when I initially censored myself by holding them back. I wrote this one on July 3, 2005. I don't know what the impetus was, and I'm not sure if it matters. I'm not sure I know what the last sentence means.

If you want the secret, I have it.

It's about the work. Regardless of your chosen profession or station in life, the work is what matters. Skip it and you will be caught. Slack off, and others will catch up to you. Cut corners and you will have to answer to yourself at some point.

Of course, that said, the hardest question to answer once it is assumed that hard work is part of the equation is, "Now, what do I work on?" Whatever you love. Work on whatever you love and don't think about the payoff, but instead the road. If part of your road is a continual hunt for a payoff, so be it, but pick a life and career that makes you happy even in the very pursuit of the thing you've chosen.

And you know what? The same goes for the person you spend your life with. Ignore preconceptions and idealized impossibilities and find someone that you can't bear to be away from. Ultimately, after the explosions and fireworks, everything else falls away and you are left with only your two souls. If they are mismatched, all of the dressings and colors and decorated deceptive masks will not help you.

Find the life you love now, not the one you think will lead you to something better for the sake of betterment.

Comments

[bryarly]

"find someone that you can't bear to be away from"

How true. It took me a long time to find someone that I can't bear to be away from, but now I'm faced with the realization that I feel somehow weakened by this all-encompassing love - I don't know how I'd survive without him. I know it sounds foolish to nearly everyone, because I was without him before, and will probably be without him again in our elder years, but the mere thought of being without him crushes the air out of me and mindless panic sets in. And we've been together for 10 years.

Is there a balance? Can there be one?

[shane]

bryarly-

It's like the Nazareth song: "Love Hurts."

Is there a balance? I don't think so. I think true love means risking everything by giving yourself completely over to someone else.

[Allison]

I'm tattooing this one on my forehead.

Thanks for posting it. I needed to hear that, today especially.

[claire]

I like the sentiment that it's ultimately about the work, but for those who cut corners (from my pov), it doesn't seem to be something that catches up to them as much as something they celebrate. Another thing gotten away with, another thing they didn't have to do. It's disheartening.

[shane]

Allison- Glad it resonated with you. Thanks.
Claire- I am of the opinion that it does catch up. Lately, I've realized that the race is not with others, but with ourselves.

[Junaid]

i've never posted a comment here before, but after reading this one, I felt I had to - just to say "Thanks" for articulating this so well. and for posting it. now when I needed it.
By the way, you should think about turning it into a spoken word song - like that sunscreen thing from waybackwhen. seriously.