Midway

The Midway summoned me.

It wasn't the plates I wanted to break, nor the balloons I'd try to pop, nor the leaden bottles that no one can knock down. It wasn't the crushing smell of popcorn and fryolator smoke, nor the flashy lights, nor the framed mirrored glass prizes advertising Deep Purple or Budweiser. It wasn't the barkers, nor the seething underbelly tucked neatly beneath the false smiles and grubby fingers. It was none of these things in particular. It was all of these things together.

There is an excitement on the midway like none other. It is at once reminiscent of days past and a reminder of the very moment; a quickly passing whiff of fried dough dissolves into a hundred memories of midways before; of evenings lit by a million lights and distant screams of excitement and terror; of endless summers that crashed to an end when the screaming evaporated and the midway moved on.

Of course, the midway always returns.

Each year, I resolve to make the drive out to Pomona to experience a Great American Tradition: The County Fair. Until this year, I have let September slip away into winter, missing the Los Angeles County Fair and lamenting my forgetfulness. Not this year. As a parent, I have become conscious of the importance of establishing traditions for my daughter. Tradition gives kids something to look forward to, something to look back on, and something to pass down. I decided it was time to pass down the tradition of the Midway and the County Fair to Lucy.

I imagined riding rides with her and sharing ice cream and petting goats and pigs in a stinky little stable. I wanted to give her memories like mine of visiting Benson's Wild Animal Farm many years ago or the fleeting summers spent riding the Yankee Cannonball at Canobie Lake Park in New Hampshire. I wanted her to relish the day at the County Fair. We'd ride the carousel and squash pennies in the automatic penny crusher. We'd eat cotton candy and have our soft serve dipped in the chocolate shell. We'd ride the chairlift over the whole place and gaze down on a million lights and the excited laughter of hundreds of eager families of fair-goers. We'd begin a tradition.

I know what I expected. I imagined a rather large field, filled with booths and games and items for sale and rides. I even imagined hay on the ground, as it may appear in a small New England County Fair. Perhaps there would even be a bluegrass band or a barbershop quartet appearing at hourly intervals to a delighted crowd. I was not prepared for the magnitude of the Los Angeles version of a County Fair.

It is massive. Dauntingly, frighteningly massive. Parking is in an area roughly the size of Canada. We parked so far away that we had to hire a Pedi-Cab to bike us over to the entrance. Once there, hundreds of people waited at dozens of ticket lines to begin the entry procedure. From there, we were whisked over to a gate not unlike the gate at a baseball game or major concert venue. Our bags, including the diaper bag for Lucy, were all searched. Finally, we were corralled through the gates into one of the largest midways I've ever seen in my life. Hundreds of games. An unbelievable number of booths offering crappy stuffed animals for assorted rigged games that were as close to being impossible as the law would allow lined both sides of a midway that must have stretched on for a half mile. Rides swirled behind us, and the hydraulic hissing of compressed air echoed throughout the fairgrounds. It was enormous. As a person who generally likes to see everything there is to see in a place, I immediately started panicking. There was no way.

Surprise #2 came when we went to get ride tickets for Lucy. I suppose it should have occured to me, since I worked at an amusement park for several years, that there is a height requirement on most rides. I would even guess that there is an industry standard of 36".

That put the brakes on our plan to take Lucy on a bunch of rides. In fact, it forced us to rethink our entire plan. Stripped of our anchor in the madness of an enormous fair, we decided to start walking. As we walked down the midway, I dumped a bunch of money into the hands of greedy game operators, occasionally scoring a cheap stuffed toy or ugly stuffed monster that scared the crap out of Lucy. We made it to the end after about 40 dollars and little success. Suddenly, I spotted the sign that would change my life:

"Deep Fried Snickers." Holy Jumping Jesus Christ in a moonbounce was it good. It's basically a corndog, but instead of dog inside of a sweet crunchy deep-fried cornmeal shell, it's a snickers bar.

Maybe there is something to be said for new traditions. Next door, we also stopped for a Pink's Hot Dog for Lucy and some fine examples of my favorite food:

Not too far away, this poor chap was roasting:

We visited the animals and decided to skip the petting zoo. Lucy was content to peek over the railing at the animals:

This is what she didn't see:

It wasn't the day I expected, but it ended up being fun. It didn't quite evoke the nostalgia I was hoping for, but in some ways, it was nice to begin new traditions.

Like humping cows.
And spending way more than $40 on midway games.
and Deep Fried Snickers bars.

It's something I can cross off my list of things to do in Los Angeles, although returning to the Midway, no matter where it is or what form it takes is something that needs to be crossed off at least once a year.

More pictures at Flickr

Comments

[CONTI]

It's a shame that kid of yours is so short. You should force her to grow.

[AJ]

I'm glad you're not doing the Cool-California-Parent thing and depriving your youngster of all those deepfried treats.

While the Megalopolis-Fair-Tradition might not take hold, there are plenty of cool West Coast traditions that you're sure create that Lucy wouldn't have gotten to enjoy if she were raised back East.

[Unsomnambulist]

The only reason I'd return to the fair would be the deep fried Snickers... and, it would be worth it.
(deep fried mac and cheese is also good, the deep fried oreos a disappointment)

[Jan]

There are deep fried snickers bars outside of Scotland? Does that mean Scotland has to go back to Haggis as national food?

[la ketch]

great post! a good friend of mine once said that she could deep fry her shoe and and dip it in ranch dressing and it would be delicious. i have to agree. i love anything deep fried. i still haven't tried the deep fried twinkie but i can only imagine how damn good it is. of course, if i actually ate it, i would want to kill myself afterwards. that's the crux.

[Merujo]

Being a Midwesterner, I have to say the only thing missing here is deep fried cheese curds and beer-battered brats. I went to the county fair on my very first date as a teenager, back when dinosaurs ruled the earth. After the midway (loved doing the "squirt the paint on the spinning paper" thing to create your own "art"), the animal barns, and the tractor pull, we held hands as Alabama played on the grassy center of the horse track...

[PeggyArcher]

Woo Hoo!!!

I'll be at the fair this coming Sunday!

I'm glad you had fun!

That pic of Lucy peeking over the rail is too cute for words, BTW.

[Dave Greten]

Tell me the roasting pig on a spit was not right next to the petting zoo...

[Colleen]

Man, that Lucy looks more delicious than 10 deep-fried Snickers.

[Mandy Mac]

Holy crap! That means I need to start looking for the NC State fair. It even takes place at the fair grounds right next to the Large Animal unit of NC State's campus. Our favorite- THE PIG RACES! :) Oh yeah and the deep fried oreos and twinkies.

[Josh]

Somewhere there is a picture of my friends Dan and Glenn pointing to the most hideous thing you have ever seen coming out of a cows ass.

[Sandra]

I dated a Scottish guy for quite a while, and he was very into deep-fried everything - the first time we went out for dinner, actually, I remember him telling me about deep-fried pizza and responding, "what about pizza is unhealthy" when I mentioned that I wasn't aware they could actually make pizza worse for people. At any rate, he adored deep-fried Snickers...and despite eating my first one under duress, I ended up (secretly) liking them.

[Carly]

This whole concept of a deep fried Snickers scares me, but only slightly less than riding The Zipper, which tends to be a mainstay at fairs like those, no? The best part isn't flipping upside down at the top so much as contemplating your mortality as you question how well put together the ride is. ;)

[claire]

I once won a mirror with AC/DC's logo painted on it. It's amazing the junk they offer up if you do miraculously beat the games...

Love the pic of Lucy looking over the rail. On the flipside, once she's tall enough, make sure she gets her fill of the kiddy rides. I outgrew the height limit a couple years before I had the nerve for big rides.

[naiah]

By coincidence, Katy brought home "The County Fair" by Tasha Tudor this week from library day at school. I found myself all wanting to hit the fair. The Evergreen State Fair is just one town away, and I keep missing it...Next year.

[JM]

The Zipper!

I swear I almost died on that thing once. It is the devil!

Did you know that there are no regulations for carnival rides?

A whole family died on the Thunderbolt. I saw it on 20/20.

[Helena]

First off, I'd like to observe that the Deep Fried Twinkie must have been pretty unfreakinbelievable. It was gone before you even managed to photograph it.

And second, I have to say that I HAVE had the twinkie deep fried and it made me cry greasy tears of joy. Then my left arm got numb.

Funny, that.

[Kate]

Back when I was unemployed and poor, I worked a whole two weeks at the County Fair talking people into signing away their lives for a one-dollar pocket fan. That place at night once all the crowds have gone home... funny the things you get attached to... Fried Snickers changed my life and the Hot Rod Museum there is freakin' unbelievable.

[Magazine Man]

OMG Benson's Animal Farm! Had forgotten all about that place til you mentioned it. Was one of my favorite places as a kid, right up there with Clark's Trained Bears in the White Mountains...